Little Baby

By Andrea Miccver

Another “What if” story. I saw something that made me curious. The things that people were saying did not seem right to me, so I created my own version of things.

I was on one of those shows that investigated stories and reunited people. I had flown across the coast to meet this particular person. The commercials were over and the audience was cued to applaud.

"Now, here is the story of Michelle," the host announced in his booming voice. "On the day of her birth in a cold winter storm, she was abandoned in a car outside the hospital. By happenstance this car belonged to one of the nurses in the hospital. Cindy had just gotten off her shift and was eager to be home when she spotted this little stranger in the passenger seat." The TV people would probably film a little movie to go along with the host's descriptive words so that those without imaginations could visualize what he was saying.

"Cindy noticed that the newborn was barely breathing and blue from the cold." I tried not to wince as he went on to describe the baby's still bloody state. Michelle listened with tears in her eyes as her story was told to the public. She would probably never forgive her parents if they revealed themselves. She had every right to be mad at them.

"Cindy rushed back into the hospital and the baby was taken to a special unit. Another nurse, Lauryn, was dedicated to the newborn's case. The little baby thrived with their attention and was named Michelle. We are sorry to say that Cindy passed away nine years ago, but we are happy to announce that Lauryn is here with us today."

I stood up off of the couch I had been sitting on with Michelle and gave the woman a hug. Tears chased each other down my face as I finally met the beautiful woman that baby from long ago had grown up to be. "We watched over you for months. We even helped pick out the right adoptive family. I would wonder what had happened to you and I would think to myself 'maybe she's graduating high school now', or 'maybe she's going to college now'."

"Lauryn, do you remember the day Michelle was found thirty years ago?" the host asked as we all sat down on the couch.

I smiled sadly. "I think about it every day."

My mind took me back thirty years. I'd been single and young then. A nurse for only three years. Cindy had been about the same age and had with the same experience. We had studied together, but we hadn't been friends. Not before Michelle and definitely not after.

Cindy came running in on her low heels with a blanket wrapped around something blue. My stomach dropped and I looked out of the window at the snow storm that hadn't been there forty minutes ago when I had gone outside to take my break early.

"What is it?" I asked, my heart beating loudly as the worst was confirmed.

"Someone left a baby in my car. It's practically dead."

A team worked frantically to keep the tiny heart beating in a body that couldn't breath sufficiently for itself. I did what was needed of me and then waited to see if it was enough. It was. The baby was taken to a special room and coddled over. I stayed on constant alert for her little cries that signaled a feeding or a diaper change. Cindy watched over her too, but on different shifts. We managed to avoid each other until one day Cindy came in early.

"Isn't it horrible what some selfish woman did to this poor child?" Cindy commented.

I nodded my head as I stroked the sleeping Michelle's little cheek. "She'll be loved and somewhere she'll be welcomed."

"You had your break early that day, didn't you? Did you see anyone?"

I shook my head. "I was alone."

"Giving birth is painful. I'm surprised no one heard the mother screaming."

There was something in Cindy's voice that didn't belong in that statement. Accusation I could understand, but satisfaction . . . I stiffened and met Cindy's eyes. "I didn't hear anything."

"I'm sure you didn't." Cindy's voice was full of fake innocence. "Giving birth is messy too. It would have killed a woman in that weather." I went back to stroking Michelle's cheek. Cindy must be fishing for information. Surely she didn't have anything. "If I was going to give birth in freezing weather I'd do it in a car." Cindy paused "You know Lauryn, I haven't seen your car lately."

Every muscle in my body tensed and a large weight settled in my stomach. She did know! "You don't understand."

"Oh, I think I do. I strongly suggest you stay away from my brother from now on. I won't let something like you ruin his prospects." Cindy walked out of the hospital nursery.

I looked down at the baby who I could already tell had my nose. "I didn't have a choice," I whispered.

The host of the show asked me a question and I had to drag myself from the past. "Why did you name her Michelle?" His mustache twitched in irritation that I wasn't hanging on his every word.

I smiled politely though inside I wept. "Michael carried the sword of justice. We wanted this little baby to have piece of that justice." I gave a real smile then. "You're not such a little baby anymore." But still my little baby.